How to Drive a Narcissist Crazy

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If you are reading this blog, you will probably be aware of how a narcissist can gaslight, manipulate, and make you feel crazy. Now is the time to flip the script. People with this infuriating personality disorder feel intensely entitled and don’t react appropriately to situations requiring empathy or understanding. They think they are normal, always right, and everyone else is the problem. Are you ready to learn how to drive a narcissist crazy?

First Step: Understand How They Tick

A narcissist processes the world in a much different way than a typical-minded person. Just like you may crave a sweet treat or a drink at the end of a long day, they prefer the emotions and energy of people around them. They need your validation, reassurance, and physical energy. It doesn’t always have to be positive energy either. A narcissist will sometimes prefer negative energy and likes creating emotional pain so they can be the ones to control your emotions moving forward.  If you can’t give it to them, they will create and manipulate your life to make it so you will provide them with it.

Check out this program by Rebecca Zung, a Top 1% divorce attorney to help you negotiate with courage and confidence, and make your narc panic!  S.L.A.Y. Your Negotiation™ with a Narcissist.

Second Step: You Are Contributing to the Situation

Understanding how you are also enabling their behavior is important. Do you let them control the situation? Are they getting a rise out of you? Do you end up forgiving them for emotionally abusive behavior? Have you set and maintained appropriate boundaries? If your answer is “no,” then you also have to realize that you are partly to blame for the continuation of this behavior.

Final Step: Extinction

The only way to drive a narcissist crazy is to cut off all energy sources that you provide them: positive and negative. Cut them out of your life in every way possible. Of course, if you have children together, this can be complicated. However, you need to cut their control in every aspect of your life methodically.

You cannot play nice.

You cannot go back and forth.

Stand your ground.

At first, the narcissist will lash out, like a child who isn’t getting their way. Be prepared for the blowback and tantrums. Stay firm and never show that you are bothered. Eventually, they will have to accept that you are no longer a part of their life, and they will move on to their next victim.

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Essential Resources

If you’re facing legal/custody battles, a mental health crisis, an urgent medical issue, serious emotional problems, including suicidal thoughts, please seek help from the appropriate professionals near you.

Suicide hotline: 1-800-273-8255
Suicide Prevention Lifeline:
Crisis line: 1-800-356-5395
Crisis text line: Text “help” to 741741
The National Domestic Violence Hotline
The National Coalition Against Domestic Violence (NCADV) Resources Marital Life Inventory
Divorce Lifecycle Document
Divorce Process Overview


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